As foreshadowed in the last entry, by winning Mr. Spartan I was eligible to compete in the next level of Mr ____, Mr. NWOC!

The Mr. NWOC pageant was held in a similar, but simpler format. It consisted of spirit wear, a question on “what makes your school special”, the talent, a serious question, and a funny question.

Here’s the rundown of things went down!

I approached the Spirit Wear piece in much the same fashion: a simple suit with a blue tie. But I took it one step further: I wore the head from our Spartan Mascot, Sparty. I presume I looked like a fool, but I was told it was awesome anyway.

Next came the question about our school. I thought the question was “What makes your school unique”. But instead the host asked me “What makes your school great”. As you’ll shortly see, my answer didn’t fulfill this second question very well. I started by briefly talking about our academics (the IB program) and athletics (swimming and wrestling) before hitting my main talking point: the location and design of our campus.

“If you’ve ever been to Hilhi, you’d know that its located between a water treatment plant and a landfill. So you can imagine the all sorts of wonderful aromas that drift onto our campus when the wind blows just right. Aside from the geography, our campus is unique as well. It was designed by a California architect, who apparently didn’t realize that not only is Oregon rather cold, but that it also rains a lot too. Each subject area has its own building, and we have to walk outdoors between classes. Up until around 10 years ago, the school didn’t even have covered walkways!”

Yep, it went something like that! There was much applause, laughter, and cheering.

Third in line was the talent. Again, I was doing DDR. But I learned from my previous mistakes. I brought a different pad that didn’t slide around as much, and I chose to dance Burning Heat rather than Afronova as my second song. Burning Heat is a cooler song anyway, and it has arguably more impressive steps. What really made my talent awesome this time around is the ending to Burning Heat. It ends with two <- -> jumps, and for these notes, I spun around and faced the crowd, not even looking at the screen. It was epic, and everyone went nuts.

Finally, it was time for the part that worried me most: the interview questions. First up was the serious question “If you could meet any president, who would it be?” “That’s simple,” I responded, “But the president I’d meet isn’t president… yet. If I were to meet any president, it would definitely be Barack Obama.” I launched into a “why I love Obama” type speech throwing in the key words hope, change, audacity, and YES WE CAN! I ended by reminding everyone to take part in America’s political process. I couldn’t have imagined a better question. Except there was one better. The funny question. “If America were to add a 51st state, what would you name it?” Without a pause whatsoever, I answered “Iraq.” I backed this up by explaining that making Iraq a state would solve a multitude of problems, including ending the war, and serving as the launch point to acquire the 52nd state, Iran. The crowd loved it, and I couldn’t have imagined two better questions.

Once the judges deliberated, the result was in! I had won! Easily, I imagine. In total, all the Mr ___ events raised $38,000 for Doernbecher! Congratulations to everyone in the NWOC league, and a big special thanks to all those from Hilhi who turned out to support my venture!

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